INDOOR PLANTS FOR (SUPER) BEGINNERS

Do you love plants but when it comes to looking after them you are an absolute mess? For a long time I considered myself a plant serial killer and I felt very sad because I do in fact love them. Every time I’ve tried caring for flowers they have dried up and died. I am not proud of this, but, I have suffocated a cactus in the past. I learned the hard way that you can not only kill a plant by not watering it but also by overwatering it... Say what? Killing a cactus (they are supposed to be the toughest of plants) especially affected me, and I was actually traumatized by it for a while. It was a pretty hard blow and I decided to retire my murderous green thumb for a while (I know, I’m such a drama queen). 

I love it when I visit someone and they have plants in the home. They bring such colour and joy to a space and I’ve read they can actually improve your mood. After having tried and given up several times I decided to try to redeem myself, end my curse and educate myself a little so as not to continue vilely murdering plants and I don't want to say it too loud, but it seems that I have achieved it. So if you are like me, I’m going to make you a small list of the plants that have survived me -Earth's biggest mess of a gardener. If even I can do it, you can do it as well!

My first piece of advice is go to a florist, and tell whoever is working there your level of confidence, (or lack thereof) with caring for plants. I always tell them I'm terrible at it, and that way they help me by advising me in detail about the things like what light they should receive, how often I should water them, how often they should be fertilized and what type of fertilizer is most advisable to use, etc.

So, here’s a list of the plants that have survived even me - the crappy gardener. I'll tell you in advance, these are mostly plants without flowers because every poor flowering plant that has passed through my hands has had a rather dramatic end. Also note (this is something you can also ask at the florist) that depending on where you live, your plants will have different water needs, if the environment is drier, you will probably have to water them a little more often, it is not the same having plants in an inland site than if you live in the seaside or an island.

The plants in this article, are in general, plants that need to be watered once a week. I water them by putting a plate with water and leaving it soaking for half an hour. Then, I take it away so that the plant can drink what it deems is necessary. In summer you do have to pay a little more attention to them and do the same operation but instead of once a week, you might need to do it two or three times a week, depending on how much you see that they are drinking when you water them. Regarding the quality of the water, I live in Barcelona so I water them with room temperature water from a bottle or filtered because tap water here can be fatal. A good rule of thumb is if you don't drink it yourself, don't give it to your plants! And finally, during both spring and summer plants are in their growing season, so you have to fertilize them. I use a liquid fertilizer for indoor plants diluted in water that the helpful guy at the last flower shop I went to recommended to me. You have to use it every 15 days or so and in the fall/autumn stop adding it, until spring comes again.

Poto: Pothos: Not only is it practically immortal, but it is also super grateful, they grow a lot and the more they hang, the more beautiful they get. 

Pothos - Kubislav

Bromelia: One was given to me by a friend who I consider a pro (I love you Mel! ) She assured me that not even I, plant assassin, could kill it, and my God, She was right! (to date it is the only flowering plant that has survived in my care)

Bromelia - Sasha Kim

Monstera:  I have always been in love with monsteras, and I decided to get one because it turns out that in addition to being gorgeous, they are super resistant. Yes, it is true that since it was larger, it cost me a little more than the rest of my plants, because I like big monsteras, but you can also buy it small if you are patient and it will certainly be cheaper. If you want, you can put a band or ribbon on them so that the leaves do not separate too much, otherwise they can be very expansive because the leaves have very long stems that open, although personally I like to leave them free.

Monstera - Cottonbro Studio

Calathea: This plant needs a lot of humidity, not water, which is why they say it is the perfect plant to place in the bathroom. I say humidity and not water, because this one has to be watered less often than the others, they recommended I water it once a week in summer and once every two weeks when it’s not so hot. It is one of the most beautiful plants (in my opinion) because of the patterns they have on the leaves. Specimens with reddish or purple tones I find particularly beautiful.

Calathea - Kulbir

Aloe vera: This famous plant is not only beautiful and super resistant, but can also be used to moisturize your skin or to sooth wounds and minor burns. Historically many cultures have used it to aid healing, and although many of us own creams containing aloe vera, I assure you that there is nothing like taking a piece directly from the plant, opening it and putting it directly on your skin, when it is super fresh. You can also put an aloe vera plant outdoors, although keep in mind that it does not tolerate cold weather very well, so if you live in a cold place, be careful in winter.

Aloe vera - Cintia Siqueira

I hope that people with more experience with plants have laughed at my misadventures, and at least had a diverting read, but my big hope is that any other 'crappy gardeners' out there like me, are encouraged. If this is you - good luck! I'd love to hear your botanical (mis)adventures, or perhaps tell me if there is any other plant that you think I should know about and that could survive me, in the comments section or via our social networks. And remember - like a love affair, a plant can break your heart and end prematurely, but it will never run out the front door and leave you!